Mental Health Archives - Page 4 of 4

How to get the most out of Therapy: 10 Tips

By Brightside Bear on December 4, 2017

“Did you know that therapy is not just about creating an absence of negative feelings, or, controversy, about creating happy feelings. It is about helping you live a productive life and about helping you develop and sustain meaningful relationships. It is also about learning and applying the skills needed in order to grow from life’s ups and downs.” – Dr. Neil Houston, Sociologist

Everyone can benefit from therapy because the essence of therapy is to help you heal and become the person you want to be. I first saw a therapist when I was 16 years old and have sought out therapy at different times in my life since- even group therapy! Therapy is a life-changing resource and your therapist is an amazing support system! What you put into therapy is what you get out of therapy. Because the sessions typically only last around an hour, I created these tips to help you get the most from your time with your therapist!

1 | Do Your Research

Luckily for us, we live in a day and age where there are specialists in a huge range of therapies. Reflect on why you are seeking therapy and if a specialist would benefit you. Next, research different therapists. Be sure to check reviews from past patients, credentials, or ask friends and family if they have a therapist to recommend for you. Depending on demographic information, finding a therapist is a different process for everyone. Some options would be through your school or university, through work, another doctor, an online therapist, or a private practice. It is okay if the therapist you first find is not a good fit for you, just be sure to give them a fair chance with at least three sessions while giving therapy your all. There are many different therapists so there is someone out there who is perfect for you!

2 | Timing is Everything

Be sure your therapy is during a time when you can get there early, leave late, and decompress afterward. Digging deep and being vulnerable to therapy is exhausting! You should schedule therapy for a time when you are able to give your complete attention, free from any distractions and obligations. Not only do you need to be attentive during therapy, but you should also be reflective afterward. A lot happens in a therapy session and time after your session to not only rest but to reflect and process what just happened is key!

3 | Okay to be Private About Therapy

There are a few different reasons you may want to be private about your therapy, and that is okay. Therapy is for YOU. You can choose to tell people that you are going, what you are talking about, or not tell them you are going to therapy at all. Therapy is a very personal journey and some people can, unfortunately, be opinionated, gossipy, and judgemental towards it. Do not share your journey with people who are not proud of you for seeking help and are not excited for you to be on this journey you are on to becoming your best self. You have the right to privacy.

4 | Do Not Lie

Did you not do your outside of therapy exercises? Did you lose your temper or go back to bad habits? That is okay. Tell your therapist the truth because you are in therapy for real guidance. Your therapist cannot help you if they do not know what is going on. Therapy is a safe place without judgments, where you are encouraged to be 100% yourself. It is empowering to have a safe place where you can talk about your emotions and thoughts freely while being counseled. Take advantage of this safe space and being honest in therapy is helping your therapist help you to the best of their ability.

5 | Am I Progressing?

It is important to recognize how therapy is impacting your life. Whatever the reason is you are going to therapy, you can track your progress. If you are going to therapy to stop a specific habit, begin to record when you do that habit. If you are seeking therapy for your mood, start to track how your day went or when specific mood hits. I even created a free tracker you can print off for yourself! It’s extra helpful if you can reflect and record the circumstances around the feelings! By tracking yourself, you are able to see the impacts of therapy in a clear way and make connections in your life.

6 | Prepare For Next Session

Before your therapy session think about what you want to cover. Did something happen since the last session? Is there an event coming up you need to prepare for? Take some time to journal and reflect on what is going on and what you would like to talk about in therapy. If you are tracking your progress as mentioned above, you should share your results with your therapist. By taking the time to prepare for your session beforehand you are sure to get the most of your therapy session. I always brought my small therapy notebook to help me prepare!

RELATED: Using a Journal for Self-Care: Six Benefits of Writing it Out

7 | Live Therapy Outside of the Session

Therapy only lasts about an hour, but for therapy to be effective you have to live it 24/7. By this, I mean to incorporate what you are learning in therapy into your life. Your therapist will teach you a wide variety of techniques and skills to help you. But, just talking about these amazing changes in your life while you are in therapy will not change your life! You must be conscious of how you are practicing these new strategies and implement them as much as possible. You must fully embrace therapy to get the maximum benefits. Do not forget about self-care, staying hydrated, and practicing gratitude!

8 | Be Comfortable Being Uncomfortable

People always say, “growth happens outside of the comfort zone.” Well, get ready because therapy is a place for your optimal growth! I like to think of caterpillars when I envision positive growth! You will have to be vulnerable in therapy, allowing your walls to come down. You will be asked to dig deep inside of yourself, which can seem intimidating. Simply think of being uncomfortable on your journey in therapy as your growing pains. It is worth it, I promise.

9 | Be Present

When you are in therapy, be completely there. This means putting your phone on silent, turning off any notifications through your apple watches or fitbits, and making sure anything that can distract you is put away. If you start to feel your mind wander when your therapist is talking- tell them. Once in therapy, the clock in the room made a very annoying sound. I told my therapist halfway through the session and she simply took the batteries out and we carried on with me being able to be present. Simple as that!

10 | Don’t Rush Therapy

Therapy is a journey. A life-changing journey of self-discovery, love, and growth. As with all things worth having in life, it takes time. Therapy is teaching you skills that will help you for the rest of your life. Enjoy it and welcome the entire process with open arms. There is no timeline for therapy, no finish by date. This quote is perfect for therapy…

“Nature does not hurry yet everything is accomplished.”- Lao Tzu

I hope these tips help you in therapy! Above all, be proud of yourself for going to therapy! The book Healing The Child Within: Discovery and Recovery for Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families does a great job of explaining why expressing our thoughts and feelings is so important (read my book review here). You are investing in yourself in a lovely way. Please comment below and tell me what you think of my tips and if you have any tips to add! If you know someone who could benefit from this article, please show you care and share the bear! Be sure to sign up for my emails and follow on social media to get the most for the positive world of Brightside Bear!

Written with love just for you,

Brightside Bear

Show you care and share the bear:

How to get Motivated- 5 Key Tips

By Brightside Bear on November 28, 2017

Motivation

Motivation! It is what we absolutely need to get things done in this world! Motivation is the inner push inside of us to do…well anything. We can dream and talk about what we want to happen, have all of the necessary tools, and still not be able to get something done, all because the motivation is missing. Motivation is the key to reaching your goals- or just complete tasks that need to be done. But motivation is something everyone needs help with once in awhile! Below I highlighted my top five motivation tips!

1 | Reflect on Why You Aren’t Being Motivated

Are you worried that you will fail? Nervous about what will happen when you succeed? Nervous about other people’s opinions about you? Maybe it is a combination of these, or something completely different. Whatever is holding you back, there is no other way to get around it- you must face it head-on. To face your obstacle head-on, you must first define what the obstacle is. It won’t be easy to dig deep and see what is stopping you, but trust me it is worth it. Journaling to reflect could be very helpful here! Once you know why you aren’t being motivated, you can finally figure out how to deal with it.

2 | Make a List of Why You Want to Accomplish This

How will you feel when you completed the task? Will you be proud of what you have accomplished and the obstacles you overcame? Will you be relieved that it is finally over? Whatever the reason is why you want to get this done, you need to keep this in mind. Try to be as specific as possible and list as many reasons that you can think of! The more reasons to get something done, the better! I have even written down on a post-it note a list of “whys” to get certain tasks done. Let me tell you, seeing those reminders of why I wanted to get my stuff done definitely gave me an extra push to knock out some work needing to be done. My vision board does an amazing job of motivating me! You must know why you want to get this done to motivate yourself!

3 | Motivation Has To Be Repeated…Again and Again

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing- that’s why we recommend it daily”- Zig Ziglar Share on X

When I heard this quote for the first time, there was a HUGE alarm that went off in my head! I realized that with almost anything in life, I need a reminder- I need those daily hugs reminding me I am loved, I need my daily gratitude exercises to keep reminding me of the beautiful blessings in life, and I need to nourish the relationships in my life that they are important to me. So, of course, it would make sense that motivation is something that needs to be replayed in order to get the maximum impact- everything in life does! Everthing in life is temporary – including motivation! I keep a habit tracker to help myself stay on track (print your free tracker here)! Motivation is temporary and is not a one time deal, instead, it is a ritual that needs to be repeated over and over again.

4 | Realize That Only You Can Motivate Yourself

Motivation comes from within. Sure, someone else motivating you with money or something else could convince you to get a job done. But, you won’t have that inside desire and drive that is true motivation. If someone else was motivating you and then all of the sudden stopped, would you be working as hard and meticulous or just stop altogether?

When you motivate yourself, the possibilities are endless. If you truly want something, you will be motivated by it. Even if it is just the tiniest of baby steps you can take, you can be motivated to take them. Small steps forward are still moving in the right direction! Wanting something for yourself and creating a purpose is far more powerful than being motivated temporarily by an outside force. Now, if the task you have to get done does not bring you any intrinsic motivation, the next key tip can help you out!

5 | Give Yourself Rewards

What gets you excited? Whether it is a new outfit, a donut from the bakery, or quality time doing something you love, you can reward yourself for your hard work. Making a reward system for yourself may sound a little childlike, but it really works for me- and you do not even need to tell anyone else you are doing it! With larger goals, I give myself mini rewards along the way and have a larger reward waiting for me when I am finished!

With rewards, you must be sure to do three things

1 | Do not ask too much of yourself!

2 | Appreciate the fact that you earned this reward when you receive it!

3 | Plan out your rewards ahead of time! Both of what the reward will be and what must be done to earn it!

If you don’t follow these rules, the rewards system will not work. But, if you do the rewards system correctly- the sky is the limit!

While motivation is not always easy, it is always possible. The book You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life is a great way to get yourself motivated (read my complete review here)! I created a PDF with these key tips for you to print out to help inspire and get the ball of motivation rolling for you! What helps you get and stay motivated? Please comment to tell me your motivation tips! If you know someone who could benefit from this article, please show you care and share the bear! Be sure to sign up for my emails and follow on social media to get the most of the positive world of Brightside Bear!

Written with love just for you,

Brightside Bear

Show you care and share the bear:

2 Comments

Self-Care with Three Sentences: Gratitude Journal

By Brightside Bear on

3 sentences for self-care : gratitude journal

No Time For Self- Care

We all know how important self-care is to our overall wellbeing. But, some days it feels like we cannot have one moment to ourselves because of how much we are trying to get done. No time for a leisurely stroll enjoying nature, a nice long bath, or even a meal without multitasking. So how are you supposed to be mindful and practice self-care? Well, you can practice self-care with just three sentences a day!

Three Sentences for Self-Care?

Yes, three sentences for self-care a day! The sentences are answering this- what three things are you grateful for today? That simple. Gratitude is such an insanely powerful emotion and unfortunately, it is not practiced nearly as much as it should be. Practicing gratitude reminds us of the wonderful things in this world and our lives we are blessed to have- and possibly take for granted.

When I was very stressed and not taking nearly enough time for myself, I heard from a friend to start listing my gratitude every morning. I did not think the exercise would do much because I consider myself a very grateful person. Oh, how wrong I was! I dedicated a small notebook I had to this practice- my gratitude journal- so I could look back on my reflections.

Related: 8 Surprising Benefits of Gratitude and How to Practice Today

Mindset Is Key

As with everything in self-care, your mindset matters! If you are rushing in the morning to write down three things before you run out the door, this is not a self-care practice. When you are reflecting on the three things you are grateful for today, reflect fully. No distractions, no rush. If you do not have time in the morning, leave it for lunch or when you are home for the day. It is more important that you are doing this practice mindfully than just writing out three items with your mind stressing and not focusing on what you are grateful for.

Take the time to truly feel the gratitude you have, to reflect on how wonderful this life is, and remember there is always something to be grateful for.

Why I Love It

Listing three things you are grateful for does not seem hard. I quickly learned how hard it could be. When my mental health was bad, it was so extremely difficult for my brain to think of three things I was grateful for. I would have to push myself to think hard of all the reasons I have to be grateful for. Those are the days when my gratitude journal went above and beyond its work. I would find myself thinking about the basic things I have to be grateful for- such as clean water to drink and fresh air to breathe. I would not leave my gratitude session until I had all three items. Some days it took longer than others, but those days that took me the longest also brought about the best reflections.

Try It With a Friend

I had a friend that I could tell was struggling. I talked about my gratitude journal, but he did not seem too keen on the idea for himself. So, I suggested we text our gratitude to each other every day. He thought that was great! Every morning, after I had my own gratitude journal time, I would text him my gratitude. Then he would respond and send me his for the day. It was so wonderful to share my gratitude with a loved one and to hear what they are grateful for every day. You could do this with anyone- parent, coworker, sibling, significant other- and spread the positivity this way!

Of course, I do not think this is the only way you should be practicing self-care. If you are unsure of how else to practice self-care you can download my ten free and easy ways to practice self-care! Please comment below and tell me what you think of this three sentence self-care practice and what you are grateful for! If you know someone who could benefit from this article, please show you care and share the bear! Be sure to sign up for my emails and follow on social media to get the most of the positive world of Brightside Bear!

Written with love just for you,

Brightside Bear

Show you care and share the bear:

1 Comment

Mental Health

Mental Health: What Is It And Why Is It Important To Me?

By Brightside Bear on November 20, 2017

Mental health- such a taboo topic. But, why? Everyone has mental health, just like everyone has physical health. Both are vital to our wellbeing. Our mental health is concerned with our social, psychological, and emotional well-being. There is no difference in how important each are to us, the only differences is the stigma mental health carries. The stigma of mental health has been around for a long time, but finally we are making some progress to end the stigma! By talking openly about mental health, sharing our own personal experiences, or listening respectfully as someone shares their experiences are how we are ending this stigma. Mental health is important and should be a priority for every single person.

“It is so common, it could be anyone. The trouble is, nobody wants to talk about it. And that makes everything worse. “ -Ruby Wax

This quote is a perfect representation of mental illness. 1 in 5 adults in the U.S. (43.8 million) experiences mental illness in a given year*. Additionally, only 41% of these adults received mental health services in the past year. But mental health does not just impact adults*. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the U.S., the 3rd leading cause of death for people aged 10-14, and the 2nd leading cause of death for people aged 15-24*. According to MentalHealth.gov, “Half of all mental health disorders show first signs before a person turns 14 years old, and three-quarters of mental health disorders begin before age 24. Unfortunately, less than 20% of children and adolescents with diagnosable mental health problems receive the treatment they need.”

Mental health needs to be normalized in our lives so we can help one another and realize we are not alone as we may feel. Brightside Bear is passionate about ending the stigma around mental health, creating a safe space for people to reach out for help, and to let people know they are never alone! There are plenty of resources for help!

If you know someone who could benefit from this article, please show you care and share the bear! Be sure to sign up for my emails and follow on social media to get the most of the positive world of Brightside Bear!

Written with love for you,

Brightside Bear

* https://www.nami.org/Learn-More/Mental-Health-By-the-Numbers

Show you care and share the bear:

How to Take Your Social Media from Toxic to Inspirational

By Brightside Bear on

Social Media’s Evolution

Social media has grown into a normal part of our everyday lives. Wake up, check social media, then get out of bed. This is a common morning routine for plenty of people. Over the years, what I use my social media for has changed drastically. When I first started with social media, it was about making sure I could connect with every single person I have ever met! Slowly, my news feeds filled with everyone I knew and their mothers (literally).

Over time, I viewed social media in a new light. Your social media should be a sacred place. You decide who you allow to see your life and whose life you want to be continuously updated with. Social media is an amazing way to stay connected with people we care about, to keep up to date with the world we live in, and to find inspiration. But, social media can easily go from being a positive resource in our lives to harming our mental health. Keep reading to learn how to turn your social media from toxic to inspirational!

RELATED: Morning Routines! Benefits and How To Create A Positive Start Daily

So how do we get the most out of social media? Here are my four tips for you!

1 | PURGE YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA!

Go through the lists of people you are following or interacting with on social media. Reflect on how the person makes you feel. Does this person bring you negative feelings? Do you roll your eyes whenever they post an update? Do you feel negative feelings towards them or yourself whenever they show up? GET RID OF THEM!

One day while on social media I realized just how much my newsfeed was impacting my emotions in a negative way. I saw a post from someone I have not seen or talked to in YEARS. I saw their face on my screen and I immediately thought of the negative encounters with them and my negative feelings I still had. As soon as I realized I had no obligation to be connected on social media to people who only brought me negativity, I felt unbelievably free. You do not need to be a people pleaser, even on social media. I came up with a rule: If I would not say hello to someone if we ran into each other in the real world, I would not stay connected with them on social media. It just makes sense.

2 | ADD POSITIVITY TO YOUR NEWSFEED!

What makes you smile? Fill your newsfeeds with what makes you feel happy, motivated, alive, and every other positive emotion you want in your life! On social media there is an account for pretty much EVERYTHING you could possibly imagine. Start connecting to accounts that will overflow your newsfeeds with posts that will make you feel positive and bring a smile to your face!

I follow accounts that are about adorable animals, positive affirmations, silly jokes, beautiful photography, self-care, and of course positive mental health. If you are trying to learn something new follow some accounts for inspiration! Following a few accounts that only post about what makes you smile or feel motivated brightens up your whole newsfeed! Seeing inspirational accounts played a part in why I began my positive Instagram account and started this blog!

3 | MODERATION!

Social media can be addictive. Obsessively checking to see how many likes your photo has or refreshing your page over and over to see what people are up to are very unhealthy habits! Try to check your social media sparingly and not whenever you open your phone or laptop. Social media can be hard to avoid when we are getting notifications sent to us constantly. If you feel obligated to click on those notifications on your phone as soon as one pops up or find yourself checking for notifications- take the notifications off!

When I first realized I was on social media a good bit, I decided to start tracking myself- and it was eye-opening! To see how much you are on social media, there are free apps you can download to help track and monitor your phone time. You can even delete the social apps off your phone to have less access to them. Do not let social media life get in the way of living your life. Put the phone down, and enjoy the moment in front of you to the fullest. Like all good things in life, moderation is key.

4 | NO COMPARISON!

You must realize that social media does not represent real life! People choose what they post on social media. They typically do not post themselves at their worst- people tend to not even post the “average” parts of their lives. Social media posts are the highlights of someone’s world- complete with filters to look even grander. While scrolling through, keep in mind the beautiful photo is representing a perception of a moment and not someone’s entire life.

Do not compare yourself to the posts themselves and do not compare the number of likes, followers, friends, and so on either. Your worth is not determined by how many people like what you posted or who follows you on social media- your worth is determined by YOU. The book You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life is a great resource for building your self-esteem and you can read my review on it here! Post to social media because you genuinely want to share with your loved ones- not because you feel pressure to impress others.

The Impact

Social media has a larger impact on our well being than most people realize. The beautiful possibilities of connecting with loved ones or people with similar interests has been made so much easier! We should definitely use social media for our benefit- to connect and grow. Don’t forget that snail mail is still a great way to keep in touch and spread the love too!

I hope my tips help you have a social media newsfeed that helps lift you up! How do you get the most out of your social media? Please comment below and tell me what you think of my tips and if you have any tips to add! If you know someone who could benefit from this article, please show you care and share the bear! Be sure to sign up for my emails and follow on social media to get the most of the positive world of Brightside Bear!

Written with love for you,

Brightside Bear

Show you care and share the bear:

5 Comments